christmas, a new year and a new blog

Sorry about the break, I was busy enjoying the holiday season in England, including my first white Christmas(!), and this post will more than make up the break, I promise. So here's the highs and lows of our holiday, and what's next.

A highlight for me of course was having a white Christmas, it was beautiful. But I learned that asking for a white Christmas can be risky, Heathrow had major cancellations and I consider myself lucky to have made it in.

Our gift from the inlaws was a great date in London: tickets to see Warhorse at the national theatre, dinner at a London restaurant of our choice, and of course, them babysitting for us to go! So a couple days after I arrive we were off. It was such a fun date, the show was amazing and snowy London was picturesque. The hubby could even stand, possibly enjoy the show because it wasn't a musical. While this normally rules out plays for me, the war horse is done with a life size puppet controlled by three people and is really amazing to watch.

That night, the inlaws took our sweet angel to a Christmas party with them in the village. I'm not sure if y'all know, but we have fears that we are raising the class clown. The reports from that night only confirm those fears. Niamh has long had an issue with the 'pi pi' song that she learned at her old pre-school in Beijing, or from someone there! 'Pi pi' means bum bum in Chinese. The song goes, "I wiggle my pi pi, I wiggle my pi pi" and is usually done in embarrassing and unfortunate locations, including but not limited to, friends houses, the grocery store, restaurants, and my personal favorite for maximum humiliation, the subway. The song is accompanied by bending over and shaking her bum bum, of course. Basically, she will do it anytime there is an audience, despite our best efforts.

Needless to say, I think you know where this is going. Of COURSE, she performed this song at the party, all dressed up in her red taffeta Christmas dress. Only catch is, most people think 'pi pi' is 'pee pee' as the rest of the song is in English, which makes it even more inappropriate. As if this wasn't enough, lord only knows what possessed her to take this to new heights, but she pulled down her pants and mooned the entire party while doing it. Eleven times. This is England at Christmas time, this involved pulling down her tights and her big girl panties to achieve. Eleven times over the night, she mooned them!

My inlaws, who no doubt had romanticized showing off their grand-daughter to their friends, were rightfully mortified. Other party-goers laughed, therefore fueling the repeat performances throughout the night.

Now I have never been mooned by her nor have we ever mooned her, where does she get this from? I need someone to blame!

Obviously, the next day long and bizarre talks I never imagined having with a 3 year old took place, and I was assured her bare cheeks wouldn't be making an appearance the rest of the trip. Or else.

We went to a party with the family on Christmas Eve that was very good fun, and I'm pleased to say Niamh was on excellent behavior. She went home to get in bed and I then went to midnight mass with a few others, in a state that is well, less than ideal for a Church setting. Smartly, we sat in the back. The Church in my husband's village is gorgeous, a 14th century medieval Anglican Church, with a cathedral-like tower and stained glass windows.


The coolest thing about this Church is that it steeped in history. It was a sanctuary during the black plague and Latin graffiti is still visible on the walls, which was hand etched while people were hiding in the Church.

Translation:

There was a plague 1000,three times 100, five times 10, a pitiable, fierce violent (plague departed); a wretched populace survives to witness and in the end a mighty wind, Maurus, thunders in this year in the world, 1361

The thing to do in the UK of course, is to go to the pub. So the Church spilled out with people heading that way, at about 1am. An unfortunate and unnecessary shot of tequila was consumed there, and once again, my first Christmas gift was a hangover.

This year was the first year the princess 'got it' and that is really a game changer. However, I don't think it was until Christmas morning, after Santa had come, that she realized what exactly that entails, and well, what Christmas is complete without a few tears? The entire family had to momentarily delay opening presents on Christmas morning, as the knowledge that the presents weren't ALL for her was simply too much to handle. Someone small had to go upstairs to collect themselves before we were able to start.

Once she was able to pull it together, excitement resumed and we had a blast. She had been a good girl this year, and Santa delivered. Niamh must have been saving up her naughty behavior for post-Christmas, because she let her Daddy have it on the way home.

The hubby and Niamh stayed on in England for a few extra days after I left; it's a brave man that faces a 14-hour flight alone with a 3 year old. Of course, they were packed to the brim with entertainment: ipod was loaded with Shawn the Sheep, coloring books, a new toy, her baby-doll, healthy snacks and books to read.

Over the next 14 hours, Niamh refused to sit down, shook her butt at other passengers, terrorized the people in front of her by kicking their seat, stood up during meal time so that the woman on the other side of her had to eat with her arm up protecting her food from possible and likely disaster, and worst of all, talking back to Daddy whenever he told her to sit down, put her seatbelt on, be quiet, stop kicking, etc.

He said he even pulled the Mean Mommy move - where he made several threats through a whispered, unmoving mouth. Other mean mommies know what I'm talkin bout.

Her reply? Shouting "No, Daddy, YOU'RE so trouble!!!!" really loudly, to the horror of my husband, who is content in his role as the 'fun parent'. His personal favorite though was when she yelled "don't touch me!" so passengers several rows ahead turned around.

The fun parent/mean mommy irony makes this slightly funny to me - only wish a reality camera coulda been there. Instead of taxi cab confessionals, it coulda been 'mayhem in 33E'.

Obviously, this can't go on for 14 hours, so my husband took Niamh to the bathroom. He put down the baby changer and set her on it while he locked the door behind him. What should he see when he turns around? She is standing up on the shelf, mooning him, and singing the pi pi song. Well, someone's bare pi pi got a smack and the rest of the flight went considerably better.

The other highlight of the trip was my super-cute nephew's first birthday, which was a big to-do. I don't think I've ever had that many friends at a party before! Niamh had a great time and we were all so worn out that we only just made it to midnight, and that's only because the dog was afraid of the fireworks!

We're all back in Singapore and defrosting nicely.

So what's new this year? I'm over this non-budging weight, and I'm going to humiliate myself with this very public account of getting real and shedding it. Check out my new blog if you are on a similar mission, and I welcome you to drop by and give me support. It's called Such a Pretty Face and is already up and running.

So that's our Christmas, new year and new blog all in one, uber-long download.

One of my favorite bloggers, Jenny Mac of Let's Have a Cocktail wrote recently about long-winded talkers. While I'm certain I'm not one of them, this blog post IS the longest blog post I've ever done. If you've finished it, I congratulate (and thank!) you.

Happy 2011.

xoxo